Vague Intro. :-P

Oh! Before I split some words with you about my newest post, I would like to have a short wind up with regards to my last messages here :D  As what you can see, my last update was on the 15^th day of September and I should say OMG!!I’m running out of tracks at this point. hahaha!

Ok pals, it’s not about disregarding the fact that I am a member of this social site, it’s about being so busy revising and rephrasing some information about my real-blog spot (real life situations). Even though, I can’t rebuff the fact that I am a certified face book aficionada. Now I welcome myself back into the typing atmosphere J J J <3 love it.hihi

Merry Christmas by the way! How’s the collection of gifts and stuff like that? If you’re going to ask me, I’ve received more than enough. These are unexpected and seldom gifts which I am so much thankful for. The bagyong Sendong was one of the rarest presents I had received, I will never forget how Sendong sharpened my interest to help and   carry heavy things (masculine nako bai). Then the visit of my childhood friend who is now a registered nurse and  soon to be a doctor of medicine (proud kayo ko bai!).  I’ll tell you the second part of my story later hahaha!!

I found out (^^)

             I got up from my bed and did my daily routines. I stretched out my body and relaxed my mind for a moment. With all the negative emotions and experiences that were about to break through my bones yesterday, I do hope so it won’t happen again this day and henceforth. I enjoyed the calmness of silence on my bed as the sweet caress of wind touches my soul. I found a place beside the window and had my eyes toured around the refreshing panorama outside. Wow!! Feels like I want to do something different and unforgettable today. With the smell of syrupy coffee on my right hand, it made me enjoy the whole thing.

Then oh! My focus went into something else. Yah right! My phone of which I can’t live without (before).  I checked the inbox when suddenly; an unsaved number which I am very much familiar of destructed my senses. I had never saved his number again though foolish as it may sound; the digits are already engraved in my mind. I do want to respond but no, not anymore as what I have promised to myself. It’s hard for me to see reality that he only sends messages when he wants to, not because he knows it’s one of his responsibilities. I wonder how everything changed but I know one thing for sure, he’s totally out of his mind and I don’t want to bother myself anymore.

It’s a great Friday morning as I stepped out from the house and followed the same tracks all the way to school. I know, I know, I am used to inform him when I have to walk somewhere because he usually gets mad if I don’t and that’s going to be a trouble for the both of us again.

I took my seat at the bus and as the driver started the engine, it reminded me of our vague yet good memories of which I have always thought would last forever. I missed those times when I feel like someone’s monitoring my plans and actions because he cares. Way back when someone keeps on reminding me about my meals and not to stress myself too much. After my classes, I missed it when I used to look forward on travelling back home because someone’s waiting for me to arrive at the bus terminal. Everything reminds me of him, even the bus itself wherein we also made great laughters and sweet talks. I want to trace things, from those wonderful recollections which turned out to be some kind of a nightmare. Oh well, I guess it would be much better if I just stay away from those thoughts and have my mind set on something else…something which will truly make me happy.

“Bisan unsa pa nimo kahigugma ang usa ka tawo, kung dili siya kabalo muhatag ug insaktong importansya, mapul-an rapud jud diay ka.” The last set of words which stumbled in my head. I don’t know if I could still find my way without the idea of having him, but I have to...because this is my only way out. Set myself free and begin all over again. If I made it through before, then why not make it through this time? This time when I’m already stronger because of the lessons I've learned. Just when I found out: be with someone who wants the both of you happy , not with someone who only wants himself/herself to be happy.

Starting another step without the person whom you used to be with could be very tragic, but never fear of doing it. You might not know it, while lingering on the person who hurts you most, you’re already missing the possibilities of meeting the person who’ll treat you and make you feel as the right one.

A deal with the future: “You can find love many times as you can, but you can only find TRUE LOVE once. So cherish it, if you have already found it.” (^^)

Mary Cherry Banogon Santillana Allera Sanchez 

Narcissistic moments

Let me get this straight. Vain kaau ko!! Hahaha. I know, I know. Karon ra ni, pwede pud cgehon J

CAMERA :)

PAIN NO MORE :)

I have to look and feel happy because this is what God wants me to experience. No more tears to shed and no more pain to suffer for everyone deserves to stand up after the fall. There is always a rainbow after the rain  and that rainbow will lead me to a life I am very much worth of. Listen to how my heart beats for this smile and stare closely to the effects of positive energy being showered upon me by the people who loved me most.

Smile and appreciate life’s greatest blessings. Let the pain be fully ejected from your heart and welcome a new batch of laughter. Let your happy face enlighten other people’s life and pave your way with good deeds as you walk on to the journey of your tomorrow. I love how my friends bring smiles to my heart, especially in times when I am fully broken and wounded. It changes me, brightens up my soul and even refreshes my insight of living.

Don't waste a minute being unhappy.  If one window closes - run to the next window - or break down a door. Open your arms and welcome the joy of today! 

 Thanks to dear mayette who captured this image. Even without her picture beside me, I should describe this girl as someone who is cute and happy-go-lucky. She's blessed with a lovable personality, which I really like about her.

 OH! THESE PEOPLE 

"The greatest sweetener of human life is friendship. To raise this to the highest pitch of enjoyment, is a secret which but few discover."

Thanks these people who made the picture taking even colorful.  It might take time for me to get to know them even better and that would be worth the wait J

Kendrex Pael, lil bro of our EIC Kenneth Pael. We're not that close yet...but I know he's a nice brother and a great companion :)

  Well, well, well. Jeff Bungcasan, a talented friend indeed!! he has a lot of talents to be so proud of. Apart from being a mass communicator, pa-make apa si Jeff dbah bongga!! :) Love you Jeff!!

Japhet!! I wonder why he loves to make faces in front of the camera. LOOK!! hahaha 

Annoying as he could be at times, still love my kuya japhet!! bleeehh :p

                                             Arvin Rodriguez (the guy at my side in a white polo)


"Ako ay may natutunan sa aking karanasan, mali ang magmahal agad ng lubusan. Suyuin ang damdamin kung kailangan upang ika'y 'di masaktan ng lubusan" -is this correct kuya arv'z? I can't remember the right lyrics.hahah
This is his favorite song. Eewwwweee as how he sings this song, I would still listen to the message 'cause it's definitely meaningful :) try singing it.hahahha

- HAPPY SHALALA IT'S SO NICE TO BE HAPPY 

I feel like sharing to :) :)

 This song is going out to those who are badly broken, but could still fully stand up because of the thought that someday, they'll be able to forget the pain  "better in time"

  
BETTER IN TIME

It's been the longest Summer without you,
I didn't know where to turn to.
See, somehow I can't forget you,
After all that we've been through.

Going, coming... thought I heard a knock
Who's there? No one
Thinking that I deserve it
Now I realize that I really didn't,
Nooo

If you didn't notice, boy, you mean everything.
Quickly I'm learning to love again,
All I know is I'm gon' be okay
Baby...

[Chorus:]
Thought I couldn't live without you
It's gonna hurt when it heals too, ooh yeah
(It'll all get better in time)
And even though I really love you,
I'm gonna smile cause I deserve to
It'll all get better in time

I couldn't turn on the TV,
Without something there to remind me
Was it all that easy?
To just put aside your feelings.
If I'm dreaming, don't wanna lie,
Hurt my feelings
But that's the path I believe in,
And I know that time will heal it

If you didn't notice, well
You mean everything.
Quickly I'm learning to love again,
All I know is I'm going to be okay

[Chorus:]
Thought I couldn't live without you
It's gonna hurt when it heals too, ooh yeah
(It'll all get better in time)
And even though I really love you,
I'm gonna smile cause I deserve to, ooooooh
It'll all get better in time

Since there's no more you and me (no more you and me)
It's time I let you go so I can be free
And live my life how it should be.
(No no no no no no)
No matter how hard it is,
I'll be fine without you, Yes I will.

[Chorus:]
Thought I couldn't live without you
It's gonna hurt when it heals too ohhhh
It'll all get better in time ooooh
And even though I really love you
I'm gonna smile cause I deserve to (yes I do)
It'll all get better in time, woah

Thought I couldn't live without you
It's gonna hurt when it heals too, yeahh
It'll all get better in time
And even though I really love you
I'm gonna smile cause I deserve to        

Thanks for the tears :(

When everything is about to turn at its worst, you have to set yourself free for it's the only way to protect yourself from further aches.  

Confused and Miserably wounded

           

                   This week unraveled my happiness. I pretty much noticed how blur our situation is. His warmth caress starts to be so cold just in time when I need it the most. I'm keeping up and still trying to endure more patience, though I know everything between us makes me so frustrated and hopeless of the possibilities that we could still polish things up.

                  "GIVE UP!! " a voice that echoes at the back of my mind. Is this the best choice? Maybe YES, maybe NO…. then I paused for a while and think, this is the only choice I have and I couldn’t think of any other options anymore. I want to hold a stronger grip of the magical moments I had with him, with a belief that he might be my last prince on this fairy-tale like love story I’ve always thought of.

                 I CRIED A RIVER. I know it takes an hour or two for a heart-broken individual to let loose of all the painful and stabbing negative emotions he/she is feeling. Though crying makes me feel better, this only covers the real pain for a very short time. The struggle to transform myself  into a new one-loaded with forgiveness, understanding and the challenge to love again, might wrap a lengthy time. The pain never fades, I’ll bring it so as not to commit the same mistakes again. From it, I’ll be able to develop bravery within myself  and that’s one of the best armors I can have for this life’s battle.

                BE HAPPY. I have to be happy because I deserve to experience it, of course. What most of us want for ourselves is to spend our lives with significance and meaning. Yes, a lot of people might have to travel a long journey in order to occupy the missing pieces inside them. A long and lasting love shall we say, not everyone can find it. Those who are willing to go through their whole life for it, would stand behind it when found. Chances are around and that long and lasting love will always find its own way for me. As for you, who knows? The person you are next seated to, you usually hang out with, someone who bumped you along the road, a customer next in line to you in a department store or maybe just the same person whom you typically see every ordinary day. Be happy after the break up even if it’s a tough one because God has plans for you-plans that will surprisingly go beyond your expectations. So defy your sufferings and think of the blessings you are experiencing right now.

              I have to curve this sweet figure in my face because everything is worth a smile. Though the yellowing stain of my tears had splattered over the fabric of my dress, I have to slowly remove it and set my life for a new beginning.

             I’ll miss him. The sweet gestures, the importance he made me feel and all those good experiences that I’ll always count on no matter where life takes me to. I guess I might be thinking in advance, but I know where our conflict could lead us. "Nowhere" do sound too scary, yet we both need to face it because it is where our separate and wonderful crossing embarks on.

- Will miss him :’(

<3  Dr. Cloud Nine <3

       

A happy Friday :)

     


               After wearing our Filipiñana attires, we rushed into the office and changed clothes. Thanks to Shenmae S. Sojor who kept on murmuring about her dress when we were still at the cultural complex, because it made cherry, Jela and En2x realized that changing our clothes and having a big splashing treat from Cindy is worth the stressful morning. “wui si shenmae naa nay suitor and siya ang nanglibre namo” a plaque of recognition is also given to John who’s been very abusive about the blessing shared to us by Cindy. Cindy…Cindy…Cindy thank you very much!! If someday you’re planning to run as one of our public officials, you’ll be the first on my list J hihihihi (kidding aside)

            My dearest Shenmae is already in love (according to John-en2x’s bf) and I have to make this as an issue. First of all, it’s going to be her first time and for sure, going into a relationship will confuse her a lot. blleeehhh :p Second, she’s still on the process of blooming into a real princess and I do hope so, that her first soon to be boyfriend wouldn’t cause her pain that will impede her transformation.  After that, I know she’ll spend less of her time hanging out with us and that is going to be a very bad change on our side. Right Jela and En2x? (ayaw mo ug disagree para way samok.hehehe).To Mayette my dearest, she washed my t-shirt and thank you soooo much for that. I’ll pay back gratitude one day my dearest(hihihih).

   -I love these people. From the bottom of my heart, thank you for making my day a complete one J a bunch of love and care from <3Dr. Cloud Nine <3

and I miss HER :(

 
                         I could still freshly recall the unforgettable memoirs I had with her. 

           We used to stroll around downtown during our vacant time, especially after our stressful examinations. We both love to eat hot dog on stick topped with chili cheese as if we could resist the spicy flavor afterwards. Chatting with ten sticks of hot dogs and a cold bottle of red C2 was our favorite routine when we hang out together way back then . 


            She loves watching movies and so do I. She's just a text away if I feel like checking out "on screen" movies at Robinson. We've been through so many things together and even from the moment I've met her, I have already felt such eagerness in exchanging words and smiles with her.

           Speaking of how we've met, as simple as like ordinary ways of making friends with people who are not that familiar to you. She was introduced to me by a close high school friend.That was during my first week of enrollment as a freshman student. I was impatiently standing in line to pay my fees when suddenly, this cute girl smiled at me. I never paid any attention because at that time, I was thinking maybe her smile was intended for somebody else. An hour later, my high school friend brought this girl and introduced her. Now I know, the sweet smile was intentionally for me. " Camille" that's her name. Cute, tall, intellectually talkative, talented and of course! very sociable.

            She enrolled herself at Saint Paul's College. We chose different course, she decided to take up Accountancy while I settled for Mass Communication. Considering that the closeness was already there, we both occupied the same boarding house, with the same room. As room mates, we do care for each other specifically when it comes to our health. We eat our meals together and during weekdays, we go for ladies' night out ( we don't do the disco thing, we have our own way of perceiving ladies' night out. We spend our night at dunkin donuts or Mcdo chatting. laughing etc.).

           I do admire Camille's principles in life. She has grounds in where she really stands for it no matter what. Despite her parents' break up, she never considered that part as something to be very miserable of. Instead, she's a more out-going person compared to anyone else I've known. A lady filled with great character... I'm certain about that.


             For almost a year and a half, she made me feel so important and as for me, she's a sister with endless advices. Words that will always give me the confidence to do my own thing and show the world what I've got.

            SEPARATION. A big wave that we have to face with strength and acceptance. I guess all good things must always come to an end. She transferred to Las Salle bacolod and shifted Political science. Regardless of the distance, we constantly keep each other in touch. She oftentimes call and encourage me to visit her. 

             Having almost the same characteristics and attitudes, we never get bored when we have each other's company. As my friend, I value her so much more than anything else. She's such a blessing that I'll always be thankful for. I miss her so much and I do hope and pray to Papa God that He'll strengthen our friendship even more. 

- I miss you Camille Luera Guzman  <3 Dr. Cloud Nine <3